Driving home today I was struck by the beautiful place I’ve been living the last four years. It was a lovely winter dusk (my favorite time of day), the sinking sun cast a pink and blue light through the tall grey and black trees; all of them looking tired and beaten after several strong winter storms. The rain had stopped and while I knew it was cold out there it felt warm and inviting.
Instantly I was relaxed and happy.
That’s the “thing” about being an Oregonian that all the transplants don’t understand. This season calms me, and, usually, even without other people casting gloomy shadows and doom all over me, I consider it a time of rest, hibernation and creation. This used to be when I typically make most of my work.
Some dear friends once called it “The Rainy Day Wildfire” because the cold rain coups everyone up and that is when they create best! That phrase has always stuck with me. In fact, I have another blog titled just that and it was what fruited this blog and together they capture perfectly all the things I am working on right now.
These daily posts are about creating a plan for how I can transition my life away from struggle and survival to blossoming and creation. I no longer accept that I have to have three lives; the one where I do something I hate to make money to allow me to maybe have time to do the things I love; the one where I compromise the thing I love to make a little money and the one where I actually do the thing I love.
I can no longer think about doing something just for money. I must and can do what I love and make money. All the anxiety and teeth grinding about the future and the what does it all mean ends now. Every day is new and everyday deserves a chance to simply be.
I will wake up, I will breathe, eat, drink, talk, smile, poop, walk, cry, make, eat again, bathe, write, clean, shop, build, crush, love, shrug, and sleep- I will cross that bridge when I come to it.